It will get better. The sun will come out again... figuratively and literally.
One day... I'll stop worrying that it's bad news about family every time my phone rings; if I go out I won't feel I'm being 'allowed' to; I'll walk round Waitrose and complain about "People and their bloody trolleys!" just like I used to; we'll go for a picnic; we'll celebrate our anniversary, birthdays and Christmas; we'll go away on holiday and walk in the sun; we'll go to the garden centre and buy another apple tree and... most important of all, my four lovely Troops will come here - I'll hug them, we'll have lunch at the kitchen table and, if it's an Airshow day, we'll sit in the garden, watch the Red Arrows roar overhead and eat cake. One day.
Simple pleasures, but ones that we're denied at the moment. These things will happen again, but when?
If I felt I could trust those in charge I wouldn't feel quite so despondent and powerless - but sadly, I can't. The people who got us into this mess are not equipped to get us out - they have no plan and no clue. We're being pushed around like chess pieces by politicians who refuse to even acknowledge the adverse human effects of lockdown. They're only interested in themselves... oh, and saving their 'wonderful' NHS, of course.
We've apparently gone above 100,000 people dead now with Covid. Awful, absolutely awful, but I firmly believe it's been made worse by having people at the helm who are completely incompetent.
No amount of "Mea Culpa" from sad-faced Boris yesterday can disguise the complete shambles they've made of it. His saying "We'll learn the lessons and prepare for any future pandemics" did not fill me with confidence. They clearly weren't ready for this one despite PHE being set up to plan for just such a situation. Learn lessons? If only...
People increasingly think the vaccine is the answer - I hope they're right, I really do, but I fear not. The vaccines currently being given don't sound like any I've ever had. After vaccination people will still have to adhere to all the restrictions of lockdown, still have to wear a mask and still practice social distancing... so what's the point of it? On the Govt's own website it says "We do not yet know whether it will stop you from catching and passing on the virus, but we do expect it to reduce this risk." That's not a vaccine... I don't know what it is, but it's not a vaccine.
4.02am this morning... Mr S-V was downstairs making us a cup of tea. Love him, he's worth his weight in bread pudden.
A head full of Covid crap, family "stuff" and a howling wind outside all conspired to make sleep impossible. Why is it so hard to turn down the volume of your mind during the night? Fast forward to breakfast time - I was feeling decidedly washed out and I looked even worse.
I haven't done a damn thing today. Welcome to my world.
Well, there's a new President of the United States - I wish Americans luck, they're going to need it. Hilarious to see so many Brits online today saying how much they loved the inauguration and how "relieved" they are to see a Democrat in the White House again. They actually think Biden is normal - well, I suppose he is to them, but they must be as weird as he is! I've loved reading their reactions to Donald Trump - they've been choking on their outrage for the last four years! I'm sorry to see him go.
We had an unexpected bonus yesterday; we had our rickety pergola taken down. I've hated it for as long as we've lived here; it's finally gone, thanks to our go-to chap in the village for all things garden related who fitted us in between other jobs. He brought his dog with him - she sat in the garden, good as gold, and watched him work... it was all I could do not to dognap her and bring her indoors!
It's been good to try a few new dishes lately - I really got stuck in a rut of same old, same old. Nothing wrong with the old favourites, of course, but even the best loved recipes can get a bit tired. It's just a matter of habit, I suppose.
Right, bedtime for me. Let's hope it's a better night than the last one.
OK, it's only a very little sign, but we have about 6 or 7 snowdrops showing their faces at the base of a tree in the front garden! So tiny, but they're a taste of better things to come once we've emerged from this awful winter. We were promised snow yesterday, they'd have looked cute with a collar of snow around them, but all we got was horizontal hail and rain... typical.
Covid rumbles on, as does the Govt propaganda machine. Boris, assorted MPs and the Chuckle brothers keep appearing on TV, telling us what we can't do. I'm not interested until they appear and tell me that I can have my life back. That won't be any time soon, I fear... they're all still enjoying this far too much for my liking.
Public opinion falls into two very entrenched positions regarding Covid...
On the one side there are those who are hailing the vaccine rollout and who think that, until everyone's been vaccinated, any measures are justified no matter how damaging and draconian. They're willing to comply with almost anything because they've been so frightened by Govt diktat.
On the other side are those who think it has all gone much too far... that keeping people under lockdown, depriving them of their civil liberties, while allowing their livelihoods, education, healthcare and the entire country's economy to be wrecked, is intolerable.
Neither side is actually wrong - it mostly comes down to whom you've chosen to believe - but it's divisive and increasingly turning nasty with one side against the other. I can understand why others feel as they do, but I stand very firmly in the second camp... I think the long-term damage being done to so many areas of our lives is catastrophic and totally unwarranted. It's out of all proportion to the issue at hand. My position means that, for some, I'm a "Coronavirus Crank" or a "Covidiot". I'm not... I just have a different view to the people who think theirs is the only opinion that matters.
Meanwhile the Govt keeps ramping up the fear narrative to keep people compliant... well, some of them, at least.
Went for a wander round the lotties and the farmer's field this morning. The field was soggy and really treacherous underfoot after yesterday's rain and hail - a far cry from the days when we were watching the potatoes and oats growing over there. Those days will return within months, but I think our freedoms will take a lot longer to come back.
Less than a week into Lockdown 3.0 and I'm pretty fed up. I'm not alone in this - my lovely neighbour texted me saying the same thing. People seem less accepting of this one than they were of the previous two; I think it's all starting to get to us a lot more.
I see supermarkets are warning against panic buying... yet again. Why are people so stupid? They didn't starve to death during the first lockdown and, having learned a lot in the last year, supermarkets are much better at keeping shelves stocked now... just buy what you actually need, you idiots.
Predictably, people are online complaining about supermarket deliveries... "They're quite often late and they didn't have my usual smoked salmon"...! Well, it's not like you were going anywhere, is it, and I daresay you won't fade away if you have to eat a different brand or, perish the thought, maybe even eat something different and let the poor bloody fish stay alive?! I saw one woman saying "They gave me a refund for £2.00 on my order but I'm sure it should have been £2.34"...! Word of advice - if you're that hard up luv, try walking to the shop and avoid paying the delivery fee.
Personally, I'm really grateful to all the delivery guys, the supermarket staff and the binmen who've worked tirelessly, without moaning, throughout this entire debacle. If I get different apples or a smaller bag of oranges, it doesn't matter - I'm just glad someone is working to get them to me. Every one of them is a star.
I'm not sure I can blame it on lockdown, but I've noticed recently I'm looking old. Not just a bit tired or in need of a holiday... properly old. Now, I know I'm not in the first flush of youth but I seem to have gone from "Not bad for her age.." to "Blimey, she's seen better days" in a matter of weeks! My face seems to be on a very slippery slope, heading southwards at a rate of knots. Maybe there is something good to be said for masks after all...!
Made a batch of Tomato and Cranberry Chutney yesterday. Tomatoes were so cheap in M&S it seemed a shame not to buy them. I haven't made this for a while - I'd forgotten how much I like it!
... another bloody lockdown! Never have the words "Happy New Year" sounded more hollow.
Boris was on TV last night (I didn't watch) telling us we have to do it all over again. We're agog to see what they can come up with next; Mr S-V reckons he might have to move out and live in the shed for safer social distancing (he'll be fine, I'll put regular food deliveries on the bench outside!) whereas my money is on everybody wearing a wetsuit and a diver's helmet. It'll make the weekly shopping outing more of an event!
If I didn't laugh, I'd cry... and I've already done too much of that.
I feel so sorry for any poor devil still trying to run a business. People like my lovely hairdresser... she's gone through two lockdowns and a fortnight of Tier 4 - she now has to try to survive a third lockdown. How much more does the poor woman have to endure? Up and down the country, there are thousands of small businesspeople just like her. It's a bloody scandal what this Govt is doing to them.
Boris is pinning all his hopes on the silver bullet of the vaccine but, like most things to do with Covid, he's going about it the wrong way. Why prioritise people who are already coming towards the end of their life?
Give it to people in the workforce, taxpayers who could then go back to work and try to keep this country afloat. Vaccinate teachers and keep the schools open, give it to GPs and open up the surgeries, give it to the supermarket staff and the delivery guys who've staunchly kept going throughout this debacle.
Give it to people in the hospitality industry who could open up their bars and restaurants again, pay their staff and keep their businesses from going down the pan... give it to students to allow them to continue their education. It's not 80 and 90 year-olds who are spreading the virus and they won't be the ones who'll have to shoulder the burden of rebuilding this country...
Right now, I'd say I have more chance of growing a third leg than Boris has of vaccinating 13million people over the next six weeks. That's what he says will happen but, as we all know, he's a liar.
All of this stopped being about Covid a long time ago. It's a power trip by a bloke who's out of his depth and taking the wrong advice from the wrong people. He doesn't care, though, because by the time the day of reckoning comes he'll have buggered off out of Downing Street.
It'll be today's young who pick up the pieces...
Took up residence in the kitchen yesterday to escape all the virus nonsense. Made this recipe for Moroccan Vegetable Pot from Nigella for dinner - quite a wintry dish but just right for this time of year. Will definitely do it again.
Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday Mr S-V... Happy Birthday to you!
Just be grateful you can't hear my singing...
Once again no chance of going anywhere for lunch, or having The Troops round for birthday cake, so it'll have to be afternoon tea and candles blown out on Skype. This is getting tedious now...
Regardless of all the stupid restrictions, we'll have as good a day as poss with hopes of better times to come.